if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
How the hell am I supposed to know what lotion to get her? They should have a dressing booth where I could go test how good it is for jerking off, then I'd know.
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
Dude, I'm importing a boy from Oklahoma for my divorce party. It's like doctors without borders, but with dicks.
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
He looked so uninterested when the stripper was slapping him. Now his roommates are harassing me about how crazy our sex must be.
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