Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
6:33 AM: I'm drunk at this time of morning.
Just cropdusted the office
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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