Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
Randomize
