i just woke up in a strange room and the first thing i saw was a chewbacca mask... wtf
so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
i fucking swear, saying shit like "i dont get jealous" is like personally inviting your slutty friend to fuck the guy you slept with like a month ago
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
Randomize
