my boss just made his own remix to aaron carter's i want candy. i cant decide if its the funniest or most embarrassing thing ive seen
Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
I licked your asshole in confidence.
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
You got into an extremely loud argument with a juggalo and slapped him, he started crying and everyone cheered.
I remember that, it happened before I started drinking. I thought you said I did something shameful?
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
Randomize
