i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
I swear that men would be more efficient if they had a semen gauge on their penises
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
i thought to myself 'what a productive day'. then i realized all ive done is one load of laundry and shaved my balls.
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
You know it was a good night when you wake up w/o a shirt in someone elses living room next to a pancake on a spoon in a bowl of spaghetti.
Randomize
