if you like me you must not know who I am
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
Coffee's working. Just killed a fly with my bare hands.\nFuck with me.
You tried to pick a fight with a polka band saying that you'd wrap the accordion around their throats
and by running errands I mean eating an entire bag of milanos by myself in the Walmart parking lot
Randomize
