you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
Dude there are two smokin hot chicks laying outside my apartment...I almost want to tell them theyre laying where I threw up last night
U should. Its a good ice breaker
I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
It's like my life is one of those movies where after a bunch of outlandish events that only happen in a movie the girl realizes her true life calling and lives a great life with a sexy man of multiple races. But I'm stuck in the fucked up part where 25 year olds come in their pants.
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
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