Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
I'm chatting on my fake OkCupid account and watching Lion Witch & Wardrobe on my second screen. Hail me, King of the Creepers
That rando I gave head to on the beach just endorsed me on LinkedIn for Oral Communication Skills. So there's that.
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
I'm sun burnt so instead of getting drunk and trying to sleep with you, how about we get naked and you scratch my body and rub lotion on me while I rub one out?
I also told the pizza delivery guy that he smelled good. I must be ovulating.
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
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