dude you just took shreks wife home. what the fuck is wrong with you
when a bears hungry he eats besides shes got her nipples pierced
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
I began mixing captain Morgan and jack daniels and called it captain jack sparrow. I puked. a lot.
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
Had to walk of shame past Westminster Abbey this morning. Pretty sure a Japanese tourist took a photo of me.
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize
