My pussy is not your playground.
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
Why is it every time you ask me what I'm doing, I'm at a police station?
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
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