my soul wont recognize me after tonight
Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
Apparently I told his new girlfriend to stop swallowing because she's getting fat. Oh, and I yelled this across a large room
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
You kept saying “keke” over and over so I slapped you then you proceeded to ask if I loved you. In case you’re wondering why you have a black eye - Lauren
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