I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
i just ordered an al pacino with double mocha at starbucks.. i'm waiting to see how long it takes the chick to realize what i said.
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
I didn't know it was possible to throw up mid-sneeze.
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
I woke up with the Dorothy costume at my ankles, both sparkly red shoes on, and clutching ToTo....we're not in Kansas anymore, dude
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
Randomize