Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
There's not really an emoticon that says "I'm sorry I honked your boobs, and that you weren't a fan of that."
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
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