I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
my mother just offered to pay for my fake id.
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
Umm my dog ate your vibrator. Sorry 😬
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
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