look no pants
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
The cabbie told us to at least pretend we weren't doing coke while he was driving
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
The only people who really get me are strippers and mascots for sports teams.
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
Randomize
