its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
I left a cheeto on everyone's car trailing to the house i'm at, hanzel and gretel style.
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
Just erased 'masturbate' from my mental To-Do list because I've got too much stuff to do. I hate adulthood
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
Terrible idea I love it
That awkward moment when your drug dealer pulls your boss out of the snow
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
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