Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
I slept with a married guy last night and then broke my toe on the doorframe on the way out. I've never seen karma work so fast.
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
Randomize
