Duck Duck Cougar?
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
the gays at disneyland are vicious
DAMMIT. BOHEMIAN RHAPSODY IS GONNA GET STUCK IN MY HEAD AGAIN. FUCK YOU OLYMPICS.
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
Comedy Central is in dire need of more sitable faces late at night - Trevor Noah has a baby face - there are federal rules against those types of sexual fantasies
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
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