You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
I called him Han Solo during sex, he looked at me like he was mortified then I realized he came.
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
i'm surprised you didn't wake up. like i literally came when he was fingering me as i was spooning with you and all you did was mumble "that's a good idea, mom" and pull the sheets away from me.
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom.
Ugh did we play golf last night and did you by chance hit my head with a club or a ball?
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
I just walked away from a youth soccer tournament popping every birth control pill I had left in the pack.
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
what are you getting to drink for new years?
well seeing as how i just got diagnosed with a uti, whatever we can mix with cranberry juice
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
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