dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
I ordered a million chicken go wraps and they gave me five. Even when im drunk I can count to a million and know its not five. They fucked me.
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
I told the cops they couldn't arrest me until they found my shoe. Now I have the grant county cops looking for my heels by the rail road tracks.
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
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