just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
She told me she brought a guy home but that he looked pickled. And no, that's not an autocorrect.
Hahahah pickled
I asked her what she meant and she said that he looked like he had soaked in water.
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
holy shit! you were walking down a hill and just happened to be passing a trash can like 4 ft away and projectile vomited over a fence into the trash can. kept walking and drank a beer.
Randomize
