she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
figured you should hear this from me. Your refrigerator door is way broken. I opened it last night when i was drunk and tried to climb the shelves. i got to the one with the mustard.
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
Randomize