I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
at john mayer concert. alone. to many highschool kids. i feel like a drunk chaperone with a pomegranite martini mustache
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
hey fuckhead. when i said not to grow shrooms in our apartment, that didn't mean "yea, sure. grow shrooms in our apartment"
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
I am now gainfully employed. Parents, lock up your children.
Yay! Welcome to the world of "you're seriously trusting me with your kid?"
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