She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
Since she's grinding up on your thigh right now, I'm sending you this text hoping it makes your phone vibrate in her vagina
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
She has also never texted me first which I think might be a tell-tale sign she wants me to die alone.
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
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