Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
He poured syrup on all those broken dishes because "syrup is magical, and by the time we wake up, they'll be fixed."
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
Did you know there's no emoticon to really tell you that I just consumed a magic brownie?
Absolute soulmates or functional alcoholics?
Can't be the first without the last
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
When did we convert life to cartoon?
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
I think I may be going on too many job interviews. I've started to bring up Shonda Rhimes in my interview answers.
Randomize