happiness is walking an amphibious rodent on a leash
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
I can't wait until weight watchers comes out with a beer
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
Randomize
