when a girl says 'did you just try to kiss me' you should leave the bar. trust me.
is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
when I woke up the last searched thing on my phone was "how to make a fireproof dress" I need to stop drinking.
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
You kept screaming how great you were at drawing poptarts and you insisted on drawing them all over my forearm
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
Randomize
