I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
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