did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
i tried to get you to come inside, but you insisted on throwing up in the flowers "because they're pretty."
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
When people ask about my bruises, I'm just going to say it was a doorknob. Or possibly a group of doorknobs. Angry doorknobs.
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
So there is a 50% chance that he just left my house and a 100% chance that I have to be up for work in 2 hours...
I just got free tacos, you would be so proud of me.
Clarification, I got free tacos without performing any sexual favors.
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