Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
He said he was trying to live vicariously through me. I didn't have the heart to tell him that meant he was vicariously fucking his best friend.
I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
just like fucking own it. stare that cop in the eye and just keep masturbating "yeah motherfucker Im high as shit and this feels great"
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
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