I can't find my pants or my car
I didn't even hookup I think I took them off at taco bell...
ha omg I always lose my dignity at taco bell as well... so no big deal.
how the hell did we fit 12 drunk lesbians in your car?! I felt like we were playing lesbian tetris last night.
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
Did you send me a snapchat of your sister triple kissing two other girls?!!! You might be the greatest friend the world ever made
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
Shaving your bikini line at 11 at night in the Walmart bathroom feels trashy no matter why you're doing it.
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
Randomize
