your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
my grandmother thought she vaccuumed up a quarter so she made me open the bag, dump it out on her front lawn, and dig through it. no quarter.
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
He just stopped me mid blow job so he could text his wife asking for TacoBell.
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
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