The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
You were stoned out of your mind. We were eating cold cuts and you wouldn't shut up about how it was the wettest meat you'd ever felt in your life.
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
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