That's intense
worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
If Jon and Kate can get divorced...how hard can it be for me?
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
Why the fuck is BBQ sauce coming out of my shower head?
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
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