i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
Listen, it's not like I meant to bust the window out. It just sort of happened. And I'm also sorry for stealing your dads bandanas.
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
Randomize
