tonight lets celebrate not being married
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
I woke up with the new contact "Britney Both Nipples Pierced"... how do you think the night went?
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
Ok now I cleared out half the bar and Em and I have 5 Jameson shots lined up for you. You have 15 min.
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
Sockward: that moment during sexytimes when you realize your socks are still on and you have no idea how to remove them in a non-awkward fashion.
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
I just shit my bed. Go ahead and make your 40 year old incontinence jokes now.
Randomize
