I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
Randomize
