It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
Must've forgot to hang up with her when I was telling Josh I plan to pop champagne if I nail her tonight. She showed up with a bottle and said "only if we can toast it with Josh"
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
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