Apparently Chef Boyardee is the only guy I'm taking home tonight.
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
Omg you had literally better be on fire, drowning, and being crucified all at the same time to be calling me at 7:30 in the goddamn morning.
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
He came to the party late, didn't bring tacos, and then asked what shennanigans we were getting into. I swear I will never fuck another hipster.
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
Apparently I bought a laptop last night, then gave the laptop to a friend who was going to give it to her friends' friend to put some cool shit on it. Anyway, I have no idea where my new laptop is now.
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
Randomize
