Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
I bit my tongue so hard I left a deep imprint. Fuck you tongue, stop getting in the way of food.
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
MY COWORKER IS ATTRACTIVE AND I DROPPED A SONIC THE HEDGEHOG JOKE IN CONVERSATION I FUCKED UP
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
Randomize