I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
i just woke with half a bagel saran wrapped to my phone and a cookie in an envelope beside my head...
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
