no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
How's work?
Spinning.
Passed out on her toilet. Dog licked my face to wake me. Awkward talk with her boyfriend, who hadn't been home last night. Not sure exactly what town I'm in, but I'm south. Will call for ride when I figure it out.
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
Was it your intent last night to burn the house down? With a waffle..
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
Randomize
