What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
I hate cats. They're so curious, it's not their damn business.
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
he sent me this 10 second long video of a gorilla eating a banana on my phone. no explanation. I didn't even have his number. just. a gorilla eating a banana.
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
Seriously, come get him. He's not even a person anymore. He's a loud, drunk, cock-blocking wrecking ball.
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
Just when I thought we may have our first low-key night together, I sang an Aladdin karaoke song to a bunch of roller derby girls, you took shots with married women, and we both fell asleep in our offices.
Randomize
