There's this guy beside me dancing with this girl with no panties on. When I looked at him he said he's babysitting his bestfriend's girlfriend since he can't come out.
What a good friend
awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
Nothing is creepier than a guy telling you "I was just thinking about you" in a men's bathroom when taking a shit
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
I just ran your car into a ups truck....but on a up note I have a handle of fireball and breakfast burritos
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
Randomize
