i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?"
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?
When I realised he had a girlfriend I just started telling them about my ex and how I write poetry about him. Which I then read to them. They just gave me pity looks and left me to finish my spliff alone.
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
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