i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
i'm extremely hungover on the ski bus and the driver is playing abba. this. is. not. okay.
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
Randomize