Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
There is only so much cookie dough and masturbating I can handle in one night.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
We were trying to sober you with hotdog buns but you refused put half of it in your bra and said you'd save it for later
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
Can I even tell you how badly I want a day that is just on and off napping and sex with intermittent snack breaks? Because I want that day very badly.
I have never seen a more amazing text message in my entire life.
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
When's the best time to point out that all of my orgasms this year have been self-administered? Valentine's day?
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
Randomize
