you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
Dude you have to stop using "I eat good pussy" as a pick up line
you told the bartender not to open the bottle because you were gonna put it in your purse in case you get cut off later
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
When I told her I was deaf and took my hearing aids out at night to sleep, she said it must be nice not having to hear drunken roommates having awkward sex late at night.
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
I guess I’m only into threesomes at Halloween, because I just woke up next to “Marilyn Monroe” and “Joe DiMaggio” in their condo
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