I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
just woke up to a get well card i wrote myself when i was drunk. it was by the advil. i am a cocky bitch.
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
Some Russian dude just came up to us and I'm pretty sure he offered his girlfriend to have sex for 80 bucks. Whoever said porn movies were unrealistic.
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
YOU WORK IN THE US CAPITOL! YOU CANNOT HAVE SEX IN THE BATHROOM!!
Dude, you are totally ruining intern season for me...
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
THIS MOTHERFUCKING ROOSTER
IT KEEPS CHASING ME BACK IN THE HOUSE
FUCK THIS BIRD
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
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