The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.
Redeem this text for a blowjob
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
Why did I see a weird snapchat of you barking at McDonald's last night?
I just set an alarm for 5 am tomorrow morning titled "Wake and Bake Its Christmas motherfucker"
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
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