people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
He pulled a potato out of his bag in the library. A WHOLE FRIGGIN POTATO. He ate it like it was an apple and waved at the librarian as she stared at him.
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
I woke up while she was taking a panoramic photo of my morning wood
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